A man who "cannot get it together" is a man who has probably not had the opportunity to undergo ritual initiation into the deep structures of manhood. He remains a boy, not because he wants to, but because no one has shown him the way.

— Moore & Gillette, King, Warrior, Magician, Lover

Today's men face a meaning crisis.

Depression, loneliness, suicide, burnout, divorce and escapism are all rising (Farrell & Gray, 2018; Reeves, 2022). Men are in desperate need of a path: structure, stability, and the comfort of knowing what to do and how to do it. But society has moved away from initiation, a process that gave boys a clear passage into manhood (van Gennep, 1960; Eliade, 1958; Gilmore, 1990). Individualism has replaced community and support (Putnam, 2000; Rosa, 2019). Gender roles have become more egalitarian (Reeves, 2022). Fathers are increasingly more absent from households, and male teachers are rarer (Farrell & Gray, 2018). The clubs and institutions that once offered belonging are now emptying out (Putnam, 2000). So where are men supposed to turn?

They lack:

This gap is currently being filled by social media influencers (Fisher et al., 2025), and there is high quality content out there that genuinely offers some good practical advice and motivation, however the online space is also being subverted by exploitative manosphere influencers, who offer immature and superficial advice on how to be a man in today's society. Outward displays of manhood are used to entice these young men, who are desperate for any kind of guidance, into imitating this behaviour and subscribing to payment plans that promise to help them get "there" (Brito et al., 2024). The chase for material possessions, women pursued purely for sexual intercourse, pure self-reliance and an 'alpha-male' physique (Fisher et al., 2025; Brito et al., 2024) only goes so far, and simply disconnects them even further from experiencing long-lasting meaning, connectedness to the real world, and embracing their societal responsibilities. To young men, however, this path looks far better than no path, which is what is currently being offered to them in their environment.

But there is a better path to take. Having observed this trend in society around me, I have dedicated the last five years of my life to developing this programme to counter this movement. No fads, no idolisation of myself, no sportscars. I don't do this for fame, or to fund a grandiose lifestyle on Ibiza. I do this because it needs to happen for the world to become a better place. I offer an initiation programme for young men transitioning into their adult societal roles, based on evidence-based research and theory. Without which, men remain in a perpetual state of feeling the need to prove their masculinity by displaying symbolic behaviours outwardly, rather than sitting comfortably in it.

This is a real, growing problem. The gap needs to be filled. It will either be filled professionally, or it will be exploited indefinitely.

In myths the hero is the one who conquers the dragon, not the one who is devoured by it. And yet both have to deal with the same dragon. Also, he is no hero who never met the dragon, or who, if he once saw it, declared afterwards that he saw nothing. Equally, only one who has risked the fight with the dragon and is not overcome by it wins the hoard, the "treasure hard to attain". He alone has a genuine claim to self-confidence, for he has faced the dark ground of his self and thereby has gained himself.

— C.G. Jung
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Do you see yourself here?

The Brawler

Angry at the world, and quick to let it show. Anger has become the only feeling he still has full access to.

The Tyrant

Controls everything around him because he trusts nothing, least of all himself. What looks like strength is really the fear of losing his grip.

The Empty Shell

Numb, withdrawn, going through the motions of a life without being truly present.

The Stone Wall

All toughness on the surface, with no access to what lies beneath it.

The Addict

Chases pleasure, validation and material possessions without ever pausing to ask why. He is trying to fill a hole that no high can ever fill. He overconsumes drugs, alcohol and food to get that immediate dopamine hit, rather than addressing the real issue that lies beneath.

The Eternal Boy

Never truly initiated. Still behaving like he did as a child, regardless of how old he's grown or the position he finds himself in.

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See yourself in one of these? Let's talk.

Begin the Conversation

References